Maybe the internet was a mistake.
This enforced loss of fidelity is among the primary problems for online communications.
I don't subscribe to the idea that we should ban knives because someone can use them to stab someone.
This is because words actually don't carry much meaning, they invoke something that the other side understands already. For example, it's very hard to have a conversation about some aspects of a relation of 40 y/o people if the other party is in their 20s. You need to relate with something of their age and build it up and even then its likely they will understand it completely the wrong way. Over the years people evolve, they go over stuff and when you meet someone who hasn't been through the process you need to be aware of that otherwise you will mistake them for stupid(because, not everyone who ages ends up going through the transformation the same way. You better know if you are speaking to such a person or a younger person who has the chance).
What I don't understand is, why people assume that everything you know about someone is supposed to be used against them. Why everything needs to be malicious?
I don't remember caring that someone took a picture of me with their Nokia when I know that they'll at worst share it to a handful of people via Bluetooth or try to upload it to a friend's MSN channel via GPRS. It won't be uploaded to Facebook, facial-recognized, and stuffed into a global database. Or visiting websites: I operate a website and I know you can parse which pages I viewed straight from the access logs. I don't mind, you can see what paths I took through the website and you might learn how to make a better flow. But technically, drilling down to such an individual user level is tracking based on personal identifiers and so would require consent under 2018's GDPR. I'm happy that it now does because I don't want Google to track every page I visit, and ~everyone uses Google Analytics because then you get perks like knowing what search queries you are doing well on (how convenient that google removed referrers for privacy)
I don't really have a solid answer -- why do I care about Facebook and Google but not about John "Malicious Sysadmin" Doe? -- but maybe it makes sense on some level. I need to think about it more still
As a result, real people are having real talk in the safety group chats where they know the members to som degree, IIUC.
Its useful to have an outsider to look at this thing from a different perspective but they still need to be at about same level. It's extremely rare to have an unrelated genius, %99.9 of the time the the outsiders are people who didn't go through the basics that a homogeneous group went through and they just do a speed run on the basic ideas that everybody first though but didn't work. Still shouldn't be dismissive, has its place when the established understanding strayed away from reality but its not possible to base all the discussion on such a composition.