zlacker

GP is alluding to the fact that social pressure on girls to be “nice” is so intense that many develop coping and masking mechanisms at a young age, confounding the diagnostic process. Boys have a more bohemian lifestyle and are easier to catch.

Same happens with ADD. A lot of parents are diagnosed in hindsight when their child is diagnosed. “Wait my son had ADHD because he acts like this? I acted exactly like this.”

>>hinkle+(OP)
If I recall there is a marked difference in ADHD between genders. In boys it manifests the way we typically imagine ADHD: the physical hyperactivity, etc., while girls are much more likely to have “inattentive” ADHD which is much more easily missed. They simply can’t hold attention on things for long and frequently have emotional outbursts but they’re aren’t as physically obvious.

>>afavou+M
I know a 20 year old boy who was diagnosed not long ago with inattentive type. I wonder how different his academic career and life would be if it was caught earlier.

But I also have known women who will happily bounce from topic to topic and the hint of a tangent, and it’s obvious to me they should have been diagnosed by ten. Some have been as young adults, some older, one at least I don’t think ever was. It’s not just different presentations. We don’t want to see it.

>>afavou+M
Both presentations can manifest in either gender, but girls are more likely to have the inattentive presentation than the hyperactive one.

Inattentive is a bit of a misnomer, too—it's not that they can't hold attention on something, it's that they have a hard time controlling where their attention goes. This is another reason why this presentation often flies under the radar: "my {daughter/son} can't have ADHD, {she/he} can stay focused on {favorite activity here} for hours!"

>>lolind+Y4
That dysregulation of focus leads to shame spiraling. Both from parents and self inflicted.