zlacker

Same here. I moved to Australia from London via a 9 year stint in Dublin.

The Irish accepted me, despite the English connection. I made some very good friends but now have lost contact with all but one.

I moved to Brighton in Melbourne 10 years ago and it's a much harder nut to crack. The people here went to prep, primary, secondary school together. Probably university too. I'm an outsider looking in despite volunteering and doing all the rest.

"Blowing up" and moving back to the UK or Ireland is tempting but I would need to start it all again.

I think I'll stay. Maybe I'll crack these nuts one day and have roots.

>>osulli+(OP)
As someone who grew up in the area (mid 20s atm), there is a well known phrase amongst locals (at least my mates), the "Brighton Bubble." Also yes you're spot on about keeping ties through all levels of education, at least in my case. It was funny living in Sydney for a year, and returning to Melbourne, and when dating one of the first questions you'd be asked is what school you went to. At least, that's my experience, with a couple of people.

But it's not all gloom and doom, the closer you get to the CBD the more opportunities for connection open up. More activities to do in general, more people who are new to the city and are less likely to have ossified social circles, more public funding for that kind of thing. Melbourne has a rich variety of cultures and perspectives to immerse yourself in if you can align your life along the same axes that nurture those cultures and perspectives. Out in the burbs, particularly in the Bubble, less so. Doesn't help that Brighton and its surrounds are skewed to preserve the lifestyles of the people who grew up in the area (this is the politest possible way I can describe it). Speaking from experience there are plenty of people who left the insular communities of their youth around here, because they never felt like they belonged, and never looked back.

Also worth remembering the lockdowns didn't help. I'm not sure exactly what you're looking for in terms of social connection but my point is, please keep plugging away.