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1. random+(OP)[view] [source] 2021-03-29 03:30:05
This is a fair question - not sure why you are getting down votes.

Background - I'm actually on the left a fair bit. So one issue - you are not supposed to really ask minorities / women to explain / teach you / help you deal with these issues because it in fairness burdens them. I'm not looking for that either.

In terms of my colleague who I'd mentored in past (before things had gotten more extreme). I think others have made good suggestions - do you want some suggestions that may have already been made (it's never truth really - just another persons guess) or comfort.

replies(3): >>pm90+x4 >>mcv+6z >>spoonj+633
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2. pm90+x4[view] [source] 2021-03-29 04:29:35
>>random+(OP)
> I'm actually on the left a fair bit. So one issue - you are not supposed to really ask minorities / women to explain / teach you / help you deal with these issues because it in fairness burdens them. I'm not looking for that either.

Thank you for pointing this out. You’re absolutely right on this one, and I would retract my suggestion if HN allowed me to edit the previous comment.

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3. mcv+6z[view] [source] 2021-03-29 10:15:10
>>random+(OP)
> "So one issue - you are not supposed to really ask minorities / women to explain / teach you / help you deal with these issues because it in fairness burdens them."

Well, yes and no. I can see how it's a burden, but they're also the people with the most hands-on experience. If they won't explain, how can anyone else learn?

Because it is a serious problem, and not solving it is not acceptable. Of course men, or whichever the privileged group in any particular case is, have a responsibility to listen and learn, but that only works if someone is willing to explain.

Although I'd love to agree that it's the responsibility of the oppressor or privileged group to fix the problem, it has got to be a collective responsibility. You can't help people without the involvement of the people you're trying to help.

replies(1): >>benliv+4Y
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4. benliv+4Y[view] [source] [discussion] 2021-03-29 13:24:44
>>mcv+6z
> Well, yes and no. I can see how it's a burden, but they're also the people with the most hands-on experience. If they won't explain, how can anyone else learn?

Take a sociology class at your local community college, read a book, read some blogs/articles by women, people of color, and other minorities.

There are a lot of really good ways to learn from the people who have taken the time to write/speak about the issues they face.

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5. spoonj+633[view] [source] 2021-03-29 22:35:45
>>random+(OP)
“Only I’m qualified to talk about my experience” vs. “It’s not my job to educate you.” Can’t have both.
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