zlacker

>>rossan+(OP)
trully unbelievable, i lose faith in thr justice system day by day

>>Clumsy+4t4
Nothing shook my faith in the medical system more than having kids.

Holy cow is modern medicine still as smugly wrong as it’s always been. Every generation laughs at all the stupid stuff the previous generations believed, and then acts so confident that they’ve got it right this time.

And as a result you get unworthy nurses making moms feel intense shame for not “trying hard enough” to somehow magically produce milk.

>>Waterl+sF4
Same experience. The medical system is a reflection of pop parenting culture or vice versa. Everyone was so gung ho on breastfeeding, but when the milk didn’t come in and our son wasn’t interested in a dry breast the only advice given was “keep trying”. Then the shock and surprise when baby is losing weight. We had to demand formula, which was given grudgingly, and left the hospital a day later. If we have another we will do breast plus formula from the get go.

>>mberni+WN4
> We had to demand formula

I don’t understand. You can’t just go to the store and buy infant formula?

>>jt2190+hS4
In the US (not sure about other countries), new parents often stay at the hospital where the baby was delivered for a few days after the birth. During this time, the hospital often provides them all their food and childcare supplies: diapers, swaddles, diaper cream, wipes, etc. To get formula, you have to ask the hospital for it, but if your nurse doesn’t want to give it to you because they think you should try harder at breastfeeding, you get stuck. You could sneak out and buy some, but you’re pretty exhausted, and your partner is still stuck with a screaming, hungry baby until you’re back.

(I realize after writing this out that being at the mercy of your hospital sounds draconian, but it can be really really great if you have a good nurse or midwife. They teach you how to bathe and swaddle the baby, how to nurse, how to rock them to sleep, etc. All skills you’ll need once you leave)

>>msteff+qV4
In the Netherlands, for the 8 days after you give birth, someone comes to your house for some number of hours per day (in our case 8) to teach you these things, maybe do some tidying and cooking but most importantly, take the baby so you can sleep! This is called kraamzorg.

It also has some similar pitfalls, as they are not necessarily specialists and it's still hard to disagree or do something else even if in your own home in the face of the supposed expert.