The agent reached out to the internet and pulled the golangci-lint docs. Repeatedly. After generating a v1-compatible config I pointed it to the v2 docs. It tried to do the automatic migration but still wound up with incorrect syntax. I asked it to throw away what it had and build a fresh v2-compatible config. It again consulted the docs. Repeat ad nauseam.
I threw in the towel and had a working config in ten minutes.