zlacker

>>joeman+(OP)
This advice to quit social media is always a hit on HN. When I was 10 years younger I read the same thing on HN, was thoroughly convinced and quit social media. I even followed the advice of trying to stay in touch by email. Sure.

Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on. I asked them why they didn’t tell me and they were confused. They said the posted it on social media. I can’t speak for everyone, but I know a lack of social media meant that I have lost touch with old acquaintances completely. I have a few close friends and that’s it.

Maybe that’s an ok tradeoff to make, but it’s worth knowing that before getting into it.

>>nindal+a7
>Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on.

TBH I have no idea where or if my friend post stuff on social media anymore. I know maybe 1 person that posted updates often on Facebook, and that was pre-pandemic. Some post more business stuff on twitter.

But overall I just kind of accept that sometimes I'll meet up with someone after a few years and realize "oh yeah, they're married now, took a trip to Japan for 6 months, and is getting some local attention from their band they made a few years ago"

Of course, the first thing men will say after that meeting is simply "I've been fine, can't complain. How about you?". Maybe they'll mention their new job, but the rest will come after some 15-30 minutes of observation and chatting about the newest media.

>but I know a lack of social media meant that I have lost touch with old acquaintances completely. I have a few close friends and that’s it.

likewise, but I'm not sure if social media would have saved that for me. It's definitely a cultural issue, especially with men.

>>johnny+ya

  > Of course, the first thing men will say after that meeting is simply "I've been fine, can't complain. How about you?".

Some of this is natural (though I don't believe healthy) but I think some of this is due to social media where people expect others to be aware of all their major events. Ironically I find this aspect of social media fairly dehumanizing. It disincentivizes direct communication. Why tell someone about things they already know? Getting the first account always coveys so much more than a facebook post. Sometimes I think we've forgotten how to talk to one another and read all the communication besides that in text. Text is at such a higher compression rate and it certainly isn't lossless. No matter how many emojis, memes, or images you include.

>>godels+iM
> Some of this is natural (though I don't believe healthy) but I think some of this is due to social media where people expect others to be aware of all their major events.

I sometimes do this despite not posting any personal stuff on social media. The reasoning here is pretty simple, I usually don't have a full list of all the stuff that happened in the last few years in mind. When meeting someone I see more often, it's quite easy to think about the last week/month and start with the noteworthy events; whereas, when meeting someone after a few years, not only do I need to think about what happened, but also which of those events might interest the person in question and what level of detail is appropriate