It's really the fault of the media, school and everyone else who pushes the unnuanced narrative that everything must be judged thru sexist or racist lenses. In that climate where our shortcomings are someone else's fault because they are by default inherently sexist or racist, this is what you will end up with. And so those who could help avoid at all costs any possibility of being viewed though that lens. Ergo the clamming up.
So we end up with people who don't practice critical skills, though they have them, and believe the narrative unreservedly because they have been taught this way. It's lose-lose for us all. Men lose, women lose and American society loses.
When my sister experienced sudden cardiac death in her twenties, 8 months pregnant, for no apparent reason at all, I desperately wanted someone or something to blame, because anger was easier to confront than the earth-shattering grief. Anger feels productive. It feels like something may come of it, and that glimmer of hope that if you just channel the anger in the right way, you might be able to affect the bad thing that you're actually powerless against is extremely appealing.
I didn't have the option of anger, but I wished for it desperately at times. Ultimately, I'm sure I grew more confronting the reality that sometimes really awful stuff happens for no reason at all, and there's nothing I can do about it, but I wouldn't wish the learning of that lesson that way on anybody.